Stories from an ordinary life

I feel like bitchin'

I accomplished about half of what was on my to-do list today, so that's a big plus. It was good to keep busy after the day I had Sunday. Work was like "let's talk about getting married!" day. One of the guys brought in the ring he's planning to propose with in the next few weeks and of course we all had to stop working and swarm around him to hear all about it. Turns out a bunch of the gang had made bets on who was going to get engaged first and there are like 4 couples they had in the running. That's in addition to the several who are already engaged. So after hearing all about engagements and weddings when I was already behind on my work, I finally excused myself and mentioned outloud that now I felt really out of the loop because I'm hopelessly single. It was nice, all the girls jumped on that and tried to make me feel better. Still, I kinda feel like the last kid picked for the kickball game. I'm going to end up on somebody's team just because there's no one left to choose from. It's not fair, I'm a really good sport! My dad always tries to tell me that I just haven't found anyone who realizes what a catch I am. I think that's just the obligatory dad response.

I also got the obligatory mom response today when I lamented that I'm not doing anything worthwhile with my life. Everyone had such high hopes for me growing up because I was such an overachiever. Teachers always wrote that I had a bright future ahead of me in my yearbooks. I'm scared to death I'll never reach that future, that I'll just end up waiting around for success that will never come. I've only been at this job for three months and I'm already anxious to move up in the world! My mom told me I just need to patient, that I'll figure out my purpose in life one of these days. I just want to do something meaningful in this world. The girl who battled me for valedictorian of my high school class (who, however, didn't get into Carolina!) is in med school now, countless others I know are also getting higher degrees, and I'm just spending my days slaving away. I really want to write a novel like the ones I have enjoyed so much over the years, but the last thing I want to do during my free time is try to write well! I use up all my good brainpower at work. Also I think I really looked to those books for answers in my life, a little guidance, the same way I relate to "Sex and the City" and watch how Carrie deals with her "Biggage." Right now I need help navigating through my own inner issues, I can't give sage advice to anyone else! Which reminds me, I miss my Miranda. Joelle, you need to come visit soon!

posted by This one time . . . @ 3:28 AM