Big, bad world
After two weeks of feeling completely disoriented, I had a major breakdown and suddenly recovered from my depression over my new job. Yeah, it's a lot of hours and a lot of work, but I don't really have anything better to do anyway. At least I'm not bored! So anyway, I've stabilized and now I'm getting back into the swing of things. Hopefully I'll be back to loving life in no time.
I actually brought home a stack of work I need to do for a special project. I was supposed to work on it all along but never found the time. My boss boss asked me when I'd have it done today and I tried to set the deadline a week from now. She pushed me to have it done Wed., then reminded me that I have Tues. off. All I could think was, "Well, crap. No holiday for me -- I'll spend 8 hours just trying to catch up on this damn political profiles crap!" Although I plan to get most of it done, I don't think I'm going to kill myself to get it ready by Wed. I don't want to give them unrealistic expectations of my workload capabilities. They've already given me more than I can do, including babysitting the intern. It's a little like the blind leading the blind right now.
One of the interesting side effects of working for WSOC is I've developed a serious "scary world complex." At 14 we used to joke about how crime, guts and gore heavy WSOC is.
I knew it would be easy for me to pick the top stories because I know how the station's wheels turn, but I had no idea it would start influencing me. I've gotten so scared of home invasions and car thefts. Now I want a really big dog to protect me, or it least scare off anyone thinking about attacking me. My brother Dean just got a puppy so I'm thinking of taking the cats down to visit to see how they react. I know I don't really need any other animals, and what's worse is I know there are so many poor cats out there that I would love with all my heart (the stories on Petfinder break my heart!), but I hate this unsafe feeling. It really sucks to be a girl living alone. Of course I could use the exercise inspiration too. With all the extra hours I'm working I'm entirely unmotivated to spend time working out.
Update time!
I haven't been able to write in a while because my lovely computer goes through phases where it won't work at all and then it will be completely normal for a few hours. So, here's a quick summary of the last two weeks:
First, I finished up at 14 without getting too emotional or dramatic and headed to D.C. for a long weekend to clear my head. I must thank my hot firefighter-esque guide KP for accompanying
me to the Smithsonian so I could see the Muppets. He gets serious props for doing something he wasn't thrilled about just for me. The trip would have been the perfect mini-vacation if we'd been about to tear up the town one night, but work and sleep must take priority. Hopefully he'll be more up to a challenge when he visits Charlotte in August. Anyhow, here's a few snapshots of the coolest museum display ever!
So, almost exactly a week ago I started my job at 9. I'm still not sure what I think of it. Basically I'm going to be cramming 12 hours of work into 10 hours a day. That means I'll pretty much always work through lunch, I get there 2 hours before I had to
be at 14 and I only leave like 45 minutes earlier. I'm sad because all my favorite places to eat are too far away from this station, and the people who eat at the same time as me have yet to invite me to do lunch with them. It's quite an adjustment. I went from a station where I knew and loved everyone to a place where I see a new face every day and I can't tell you the name of a single photographer. It's a whole new world. Plus I don't really work closely with anyone. I'm kinda isolated at a little corner desk in the newsroom so it's lonely.
Ok, only one more complaint on this rant: the job is seriously video-focused rather than word focused, the latter of which I think makes the news more accessible to people because not everyone has a computer that plays video well. (It's a big change to go from a place that was news-driven to a place that is ratings and ad-driven -- the videos of course have ads, so we have to direct them to the videos!) I had hoped my writing skills could improve the quality of the site as it is right now, but it looks like I won't have the time or resources. Adding images and video to news stories takes 10 more steps than it took at 14, and thus a lot more time, and the information is inaccessible. Few stories have scripts and even the most basic info on an important story is hard to come by. I pretty much have to memorize a few facts while copying video during the 12, 5, 5:30 and 6 p.m. broadcasts and write 3-4 bare bones sentences just to have something to attach the video to. I feel a little bit like my Carolina education is going to waste and I'm getting paid the big bucks to be a minutia laborer. I think I may have sold my soul for the next three years. Pray for me!
Maybe once I get established I can start giving my suggestions to the newsroom to improve the site. Right now I don't feel like I have a voice because I've only been there 5 days. But there is one huge beautiful benefit -- I get real weekends! That will come in handy this weekend when I have to head to Greenville for the internment of my grandmother's ashes. What the hell do you wear to this kinda of thing? Black seems like the obvious answer, but she died two years ago and I don't think she'd want everyone still in mourning-wear. I think I really deserve that stiff drink that I'll be having tomorrow at the Gin Mill.
What a day!
So today was the big day. I had to make the decisions I'll have to stick with for at least the next year, if not three. Although I had originally decided to go back to school, WSOC made me an offer I couldn't refuse. I'm going to defer admission to American, so if in a year I still want to pursue my master's I'll have that option. I'm picking up the contract from WSOC tomorrow so I can see what it takes to get out of it and see if I need to negotiate a clause for school. On the downside, News 14 took away my severance pay because they offered me another job. I just better get my damn vacation pay! I had hoped to use the severance for a new computer since mine is shot, but I guess that will have to wait.
On to almost bigger news! I finally got up the nerve to chop my hair for Locks of Love. For anyone who doesn't know about it, it's a charity that uses donated hair to make wigs for children and young adults who've lost their hair due to cancer treatments. You have to give at least 10 inches so I've been growing my hair out for about a year. I'm a charitable kind of girl, and I know I don't have much money to give, but I certainly could give some hair. So check out the before and after:
I'm not nuts about the cut yet. It's really, really short! Shorter than I had anticipated. Plus I hate pics of myself so just putting these up is painful, but necessary for my far-away friends. (And my mom did a really good job of making it look like I have a tree growing out of my back.) But, it will grow back. The closer it gets to my shoulders, the happier I'll be.
Anyhow, in other news, the first pics of Shiloh Jolie-Pitt have arrived. You can see a small shot on the
Gawker. It looks like the reports were right, the baby has Angelina's lips and Brad's nose. But for the most part, not the cutest baby ever. The nose/lips combo may be kinda weird. However, I'm still going to get ahold of a People or Hello! magazine on Thursday.
Decisions, decisions
In the course of 24 hours I went from having no options to having too many options. I got an offer to stay at News 14 and work on the assignment desk and do Web on the weekends. On the plus side I'd make more money and still get to keep my free cable and Internet. On the negative side I'd only be doing what I really love on weekends. I'm also anticipating a job offer from WSOC to be a Web producer. I'd get to do the job I want five days a week, but the Web site is lower quality and I'm not likely to make enough money to make up for the benefits I'll lose. Plus I'll have to sign a three-year contract, but I wouldn't have to work on weekends. The benefit of those options is I wouldn't have to move and I could sign another lease at my complex.
Then last night I got my acceptance to American University's grad school. I'd have to move to be there in late August, which means I'd have to pay $250 extra a month on my apartment until then. I'd also have to start looking for a job up in D.C. But, I'd have a higher degree in an emerging industry, and I admit that I just love to learn. I'd only be taking classes on subjects I enjoy, which sounds like fun to me. A master's doesn't necessarily get you ahead in my field though, and I'm not sure if I'll ever teach. At the same time, the program is awesome and I wouldn't have to give up gaining experience while I get the degree because it's a weekend program.
On top of all that, WRAL in Raleigh contacted me and is interested in hiring me as a Web producer. Potentially I could work there and travel to D.C. for Saturday classes. I'm sure I'd get tired of that after awhile though, especially with gas prices so high.
So here I am, feeling like I have to decide the rest of my life in just a few days. It's pretty nerve-racking. On the one hand I don't want to move because it's a hassle, on the other it may be what's best for my future. Or it may not be. How do I choose?
